Grief

I have been so sad. When my sister in law died, it was like all 3 deaths of this year were compounded and just came crashing down on me. All of a sudden, it was like dad had just died, and his wife, and now Misty. I tried so hard to just let the feelings flow. I even planned an emotional purge time, after work, so that I could just let the tears flow. That didn't work.

I have such an issue with showing weakness in front of others. And I grew up believing that crying was a sign of weakness. I'm evolving, slowly. And I know that crying is not a sign of weakness, that grieving for loved ones doesn't make you weak.

I've been so proud of my brother, being so open about his heartbreak, about how much he misses his wife. I'm hoping that will help him to heal. He isn't closing himself off to the feelings. He is a broken man, and he is not afraid of looking weak, he is grieving. I will do what I can for him, and at the same time, I am learning from him.

I will talk with his kids soon and put up some information about them. Along with a way for us to help them financially for this upcoming holiday season.