Wednesday, June 30, 2010

A Giveaway

I'd like to offer one of you free entrance into my Artist Empowerment Course starting July 5!

Here's what you need to do to enter. Share this link on twitter/facebook/other places you can think of: and leave me a comment for EACH time you do this!

I will pick a winner on Monday. If you are the winner and you've already paid the entry fee, I will reimburse the fee to you! That's it!

If people have any questions regarding this contest or the class, please direct them to me. My email is

Please don't forget to leave a comment each time you promote. And thank you for helping me get the word out!

Tuesday, June 29, 2010


I woke up this morning concerned. Concerned that I wasn't reaching far enough out with the advertising for my class. The class starts next Monday, and I will hold registration open through Tuesday. And in the meantime, I'm trying to figure out how to spread the word. I believe in this class *that* much! Every artist I know struggles with fear, deals with hurdles, and has crazymakers who try to stand in the way of their success.

This clas addresses all of those. And so much more. The link is at the top right column for a bit more information. Please read all the comments on that post as well for further answers. I hope you'll join us, and please help me get the word out.

Monday, June 28, 2010


I went to bed last night full of excitement. I felt closer than ever to realizing my dreams. I received clarity while reading a magazine. I have swept so many of my dreams under the rug because they would be judged adversely by those around me.

However, I now realize that those closest to me would support me fully. The rest simply do not matter. I am around a lot of close minded people in my daily life. I've adapted by hiding my true self. That is no longer acceptable to me. It's time to shine, and it's time to realize all of my dreams!

Change such as this is never easy. And I'll have those crazymakers who try to stall my progress. But on the other end of the spectrum I'll have the ones who truly know me, and I'll have you. I will get there, and I will start today!

Friday, June 25, 2010

Let's Get Empowered!

It's Friday and we have an amazing weekend ahead of us. I will be meeting an online friend at a balloon festival. I'm hoping the balloon festival will provide a lot of photo opportunities.

There is a little over a week before my online class begins. I've already had many people sign up, but wanted to make sure to mention it so that all who are able can seize the opportunity. The class will help you to deal with those crazymakers in your life. It will help you to keep your art safe and sacred. Help you to conquer fear, convert your dreams into goals and accomplish them!

It doesn't matter WHAT your art is! Perhaps you knit or crochet. Perhaps you are a writer. A soapmaker. A jewelry designer. A painter. A photographer. Perhaps you dabble in many. Perhaps you have been hoping for a supportive web to encase you. This class will help you. Maybe you are the one who gets bogged down with taking care of everyone else, never leaving time to pursue YOUR dreams. Do this for yourself!

I do hope that you join us! Class will begin on July 5 (though you do NOT have to be present on that day, as I know many of you will be busy). Please click on the link in the upper right column for more information.

Thursday, June 24, 2010

Fight for It

I've thought alot about yesterday's post, and yes, I know that regardless of the diagnosis, there's always hope. I was just writing about the attitude I took to it. Receiving the diagnosis of MS hit me hard because I watched my mom deteriorate.

I've done a lot of research, and know there are at least 7 different types of MS. Each of them with varied results. My brain was telling me not to give up, but my heart accepted death as the fate. Many reasons for that.

If I were to receive the diagnosis today, after as far as I've come, I don't think I'd give up. I think I would begin some sort of treatment immediately and fight it like a madwoman. What's different? Age. Wisdom. Many life lessons. And the fact that I have built a life worth fighting for. I have created beauty and joy. And love. Much love.

If you were to receive a dire diagnosis, what would sustain you? What have you surrounded yourself with that would be worth fighting for? It's never too late to build the life you want.

Wednesday, June 23, 2010

When You are Dying...

When you have a diagnosis, and you have something with no cure... when you have the same disease that your mother died from... when you are dying:

You stop seeing the vibrant colors of the every day. You lose the pep in your step. Your life stops being about excelling. It gets to be about surviving. You start putting your affairs in order. You try to make sure the "survivors" will be ok.

You stop growing. You stop setting goals aside from "don't lose this ability", "don't get sicker". You stop contributing to the world.

You put your novel away, figuring you'll never be alive to finish it anyway.

But mostly, you lose hope. You stop inspiring others. You stop giving, you try not to take too much, but you stop contributing.

6 years were robbed from me. 6 years I no longer saw the bright everyday colors.

But today I sit here shaking my fist at that diagnosis. I see the colors, I excel each and every day. I am working on projects and I am contributing.

Monday, June 21, 2010

My Diagnosis of MS

When I was pregnant with my 2nd child (who is now 16), I had some crazy symptoms. I would lose all sensation in my legs, falling on my face several times. My mom had died from MS when I was 14, and because of the family link, the doctors always looked towards it.

The symptoms would stop for months at a time, only to pop up again later. Tests were ran, and then I got pregnant with my 3rd son. I put a halt to all tests at that point. I concentrated on my 2 sons that I already had, and the new baby who would be joining us.

I had my youngest son when I was 24, and about 2 years later, was diagnosed with MS. I was at the end of my marriage, and had seen what MS would do to a person. I made the choice to not tell my husband about the diagnosis. I did not want him to stay because I was ill. It seems when you receive a diagnosis such as mine, you make some bad choices. That marriage ended.

A few years later, I chose to tell the boys about my diagnosis. At Disneyland, of all places. It's supposed to be the happiest place on earth, and I tell them their mom is dying. Wow. I was also in a new relationship. With a man who would take good care of me, but who was NOT right to raise my children. So, I moved hours away from my ex. (Becoming the queen of bad choices), and let my ex take care of my boys. Don't get me wrong, he's an excellent dad. And what a job he has done! However, here I was in a losing relationship with someone who "would take care of me" and had lost my main reason to live.

I had gotten married prior to that move. So, I'm away from my children, and in this marriage that I always knew wouldn't work. It has now been 6 years since my diagnosis. The MS was with me each and every day. I knew the steps that were to come, because I had watched mom deteriorate. I was prepared. The boys were in a good place, but it wasn't enough.

I hadn't been to the doctor for follow ups this whole time. I was prepared for the worst. But something told me that I needed to fight. So back to a neurologist I went. A dr. who was well known for his MS treatments. He listened to me chronicle this ugly illness. And he said something that stopped me short "I know MS in all of it's forms, and this does NOT sound like MS to me." So off to an MRI I went.

So, after 6 years, I now learn that I do not have MS. I am not indeed dying. Wow. My life changed again. The marriage was no longer acceptable. I patched my relationship with my boys. I stopped being the queen of bad decisions.

And I learned. I learned that life is worth fighting for. I learned that no matter what label you are given, you can fight it. Life is not about what is thrown at you. Life is about how you deal with it.

A Creative Weekend

I made 6 new journals this weekend. It felt good to be creating like that. Friday, I had taken the day off and went to the leather store. I love that place! Next weekend will be full of family time and going to the balloon festival!

My class starts in 2 weeks and I've never been more ready! The link to the information is at the top right column of this blog. Please let me know if you have any questions.

I'm tired today, as I didn't sleep well last night. So tonight will be an early bedtime for me, I function best when I'm well rested. What will today bring for you? Did you receive any inspiration over the weekend? Has the universe been speaking to you?

It's been shouting at me. Doors have been flying open and I'm doing all I can to enter them! I am now wondering if this has been happening all along and I've just ignored it, or if I'm finally ready so this is now happening. I think it's more than now I'm listening!

Friday, June 18, 2010


Today is my day off. My plan was to sleep in. I made it to 6am. But that's an hour later than I usually get up during the week. I woke up feeling refreshed and ready to make some journals! I've been very cautious to not make too many plans for this weekend. If I have the energy and am feeling well, I'll make plans as I go.

I have 3 custom journals to make this weekend, and one will hopefully make me learn more about working with fimo clay. I'm all about learning new things! I've written in the past about how driven I am. I have to be moving forward at all times--either learning new things, making things, planning, preparing, even cleaning. I am always about forward movement, and that is what makes me nuts when I don't feel well and get slowed down.

So, this weekend, I will have forward movement, but I will also practice excellent self-care. I will get good sleep, I will eat healthy, and I won't push my body to do things that it's not up for. I do hope that it will allow my creativity as a reward.

Time's a ticking! Class starts July 5. The first week will be about intros, personal stories, beginning journaling, and a group chat. So you do not have to be available right on July 5. See details here, and don't forget to sign up!

Thursday, June 17, 2010

Allergies Slowing Me Down

This is a custom journal I made for a lady in Australia. It's on it's way to her today! I have 2 more custom journals to make tomorrow. I really enjoy doing custom work because it makes me learn new things. I learned how to brand leather for this one, as she wanted her initials on it. I also learned what type of glue to use to affix a button back to a rock. Learning is good! If there's something special you'd like, just let me know!

I'm pretty anti drugs. I don't like pharmaceuticals swimming through my body. This time of year, however, I always ending up going to my doctor because my allergies get so bad. I feel like a walking drug store and it makes me tired. Today, in addition to allergy meds and nasal spray, I'm taking pills for a UTI... my body does not like all of this! When I'm not feeling well, my body wants to sleep... sleep and heal until I do feel well. But with my busy-ness that really hasn't been an option.

Tomorrow, however, I'm taking the day off. I am going to sleep in. I am going to get caught up on my custom orders. I am going to rest too though. I need to heal so that I'm at 100% for my upcoming class! This class is going to be life-altering. Both to myself, and to the people who choose to take it with me! We start on July 5, so it's not to late! For more details, go here.

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

Baby Steps

Yesterday, I took several steps forward. Well, more like leaps... and it felt good. I made contact with two very special people about wholesale orders for my journals. I have not heard back yet, but that's ok. Of course, I hope I do, and I hope my efforts led somewhere, but even if they didn't, I made the effort. I proved things to myself.

Today, I will take more steps. Steps towards my ultimate independance. Steps toward my true North. I know from past experience that the more I take these baby steps, the more likely they will lead somewhere. I read somewhere that Stephen King put a nail on the wall, and when he was submitting his first manuscript, he would put his rejections up on that nail. The nail was full before he was accepted. Consider my nail up. I am ready.

I've done the work. Inner and outer. I know who I am. I know my work. Rejection will not kill me, it will just make me more determined. So, I am taking baby steps. They will turn into leaps!

Tuesday, June 15, 2010


This journal will be listed in my shop today. I'm having such a good time creating new and inspiring journals! This one has a goddess button for the closure and the word "Create" branded on it.

I personally feel much more... alive? happy? fulfilled? yeah, pretty much all of those when I'm creating. When I'm pursuing the things I enjoy, and when they bring something to other's lives... that just makes it all the more amazing!

That is part of what I will touch on in my upcoming class. Besides getting your creativity flowing, but how to keep creating things you love despite crazymakers in your life. Despite the people who say they support you but who will do anything they can to stand in the way of your creativity. As artists, we need to be selfish at some points. We need to take that time to fill our well. And as women, being selfish goes against everything we've been taught. So the first start of the battle is within. We are doing a tug of war.

What I will tell you at this point is that once you put that type of selfishness into practice (and it's not a bad thing, it makes you a more whole, happier person), then those around you will adjust and it will stop being a struggle. But, yes, what a battle it is to begin....

I do hope you'll join us for our class. It will begin July 5 and there is a link on the upper right column of this blog!

Monday, June 14, 2010

Finding the Flow

So, last week I thought I had a head cold. Now I know it's allergies. The weather has been so odd that I never expected allergies to be hitting this late. I thought I had escaped them this year, somehow. So now, I'm using my Flonase, my allergy meds, downing local honey... and trying to find the flow.

I was basically unplugged this weekend, popping online here and there to get something done, but not lingering. Saturday was spent running errands and going out with friends. Yesterday I completed all but one finishing touch for a custom order and got another journal almost completed as well. I had not made journals for awhile and that felt good!

This evening I will be finishing both journals and listing. Hopefully the evening will also include more creativity. And the day will include the allergies easing up.

Friday, June 11, 2010

Feeling Icky

This picture shows how I feel today. Dark, cloudy... but the sun is still there :-). It is one of those days where I should just be able to stay home sick, but my boss is on a trip, so not only do I work all day, but I will run the show. Yay. I will take tons of vitamin c, some zinc, and take tea with me so I can drink hot tea all day.

I have been networking like mad, expanding my circle. And my dreams are seeming more and more real these days. Life is really good. I am going to beat this stupid head cold, and I'm going to dive in.

I don't really have anything else today. Please tell me something inspirational or exciting in your life. And don't forget to check out my online class... the link is at the upper right column of this blog.

Thursday, June 10, 2010

Sharing Grief

I saw a dear friend of mine yesterday. I had not seen her in months and had been wondering where she was. As some of you know, I work at a sand and gravel pit. I call this friend Boulder Girl because she does amazing landscape work with rocks and comes in to hand pick boulders. So... considering that it's spring and many are doing such projects, it's strange that she hasn't been in. But... she came in yesterday and I asked her where she has been. Her father passed away suddenly in April she told me. She lost a month of work and has still been feeling quite lost.

I told her that my Dad had passed away in February and we talked a little. We hugged. Then I gave her the link to this blog. I told her how I had blogged through my grief and the best advice I could give is "fake it til you make it". She said she would go home and read... and I hope she found some comfort in my struggles.

I've been reading back in my blog, hopping around, clicking on the 'you may also like' feature at the bottom of each post. There are treasures hidden here! I've been asked to submit this blog to a self-help directory where I could reach a much larger audience! What an honor! Also, many of you know that this blog will be made into a book at some point. I cover so many topics, I'm not sure exactly what the focus will be just yet, but it comes more into focus every day!

I added a link to the top right of the page for information regarding my Artist Empowerment Class and put up the pay button. I do hope that many of you will be able to join me!

Wednesday, June 9, 2010

Forge Onward

There will always be those crazymakers in life who want to act as a speedbump. People who can't help but spin around and try to draw you in to their crazy. I'm dealing with one such person right now. And though I'm an extremely peaceful person, I will take whatever steps necessary to protect my passions. This is someone not in my life, so I will say what needs to be said, creating the barriers that I need to, and I will move on.

It is much more difficult to do when the crazymaker resides with you. I've dealt with that one as well. All I know for absolute certain is that if you are becoming stronger and don't let them affect you, they will eventually tire and move on. And yes, it's absolutely exhausting. It can definitely be a two steps forward, three steps back kind of situation. Not fun at all. And crazymakers seem to have an ever increasing arsenal to draw from.

When you're dealing with that, it's best to have reinforcements. Even if it's an online group who can "fill your well" when the crazymaker absolutely drains you. Seek the help of others, let someone in, so that you can have the support that you so dearly deserve.

What have been your experiences with crazymakers?

Tuesday, June 8, 2010

Artist Empowerment Class

I have been on a mission for a few years now. I've been creative my whole life, flitting from craft to craft. Every time I'd fall short, I'd stop for awhile, then pick up something else later. But the biggest part of my mission started with this blog. I journalled through my struggles. I fought the urge to quit, time after time. And in the process of saving myself, I began helping others.

That process extends to friends, both in real life and online. I've been part of major brainstorming sessions that have led to greatness, I have helped others one on one when they were ready to walk away. I've eased their worries, empowered them, and they have gone on to be much happier and fulfilled in their art.

I've had this desire to help others most of my life, and it has transformed into an idea for an online class. I swam against the current to prepare for this class. I conquered my fears and am forging onwards. My Artist Empowerment Class is all about helping others do the same. Conquer the fear, create a circle of trust, block out those that you can't trust, learn the difference in dreams and goals, convert goals to dreams, give yourself permission to succeed, and so much more!

I do hope you will join me on this journey! The class will be 6 weeks long, will begin July 5, 2010. The only absolutely necessary item you will need is a journal, and it can be any journal, as long as it has space to write in. This class will be $25, payable through paypal and I will have a payment button up soon.

Please contact me with any questions!

Monday, June 7, 2010


I spent the weekend around family and friends that I haven't really been around much since my recent divorce from my 2nd husband. We got my oldest son graduated. We had lots of laughs and caught up on old times.

The most amazing thing to me though, is the strain from EVERY prior visit (during my marriage to my 2nd husband), was gone. There was none of the drama, no tension. And everything felt... right. Total acceptance was felt by me, and I'm sure I was giving those same vibes.

It's amazing how the dynamics change, though I can't say it was all about the absence of one person. I have changed drastically. I am calmer, less on edge, and much more at peace. I put that out there, and it helps others at the same time.

My first husband and I have always remained friends. We have 3 amazing sons together, and there is nothing we can't accomplish for those boys when we are a unified front. I hear stories of ugly divorces. Of custody battles. Of couples with children who can NOT get along and it makes me so sad. I am thankful that we can be a family. I'm thankful that the boys have so many adults who love them completely. And I am thankful for acceptance.

What are you thankful for?

Friday, June 4, 2010


I ran across this post by Kelly Rae Roberts earlier in the week and I've been absolutely inspired. Throughout the week, I've been compiling my own letter in my mind, and I am just about ready to write it.

I have a lot of intentions that I've talked to friends about. A life that I am working towards. Over the years, I've developed kind of a BS filter... maybe that's not the right word for it. Something that sends up red flags when I'm in toxic situation and I don't want that BS in my life. Those red flags get quite annoying when they pop up day after day, til I finally have to just get myself OUT of that situation.

So, my life is still a work in progress... I'm sure it always will be. But one of my major hopes is that the red flags can stop popping up so regularly.

I have decided that my Artist Empowerment Course will begin on July 5. I will post all the details in the next week or so.

What inspires you to make change? How are you creating the life you want?

Thursday, June 3, 2010


I feel more and more that I am building the life I want. I'm working towards the day to day that I want. I am surprised, much of the time, at how smooth a transition everything is.

However, right now I'm struggling. Struggling with "I-want-what-I-want-and-I-want-it-NOW". I struggle with patience, as you all know. I am working on it. And it is definitely work. Very hard work for me.

I have decided the class will begin very shortly after the 4th of July Holiday. Please email if you'd like more details (I can tell you what I'm pretty sure of so far), but I'm having a few problems with the hosting site, so I'm still ironing out a few things. And no-one wants to be committed to a brand new class right before a major holiday (assuming you are in the U.S.). My email is

So, I will keep building this life I want. And I will try to be patient. I will try to make my transitions gracefully. Do any of you have any advice for me on that?

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

So Excited!

I am not a patient person, though I am working on it every day. I want my 6 week class of artist empowerment goodness to start right now! I am so excited about the entire thing, and I want to make those connections with artists. I want to see everyone's creativity take off and flow like a rushing river. I will wait, I'm still figuring out the host site, figuring out how long it takes for invites to get to the students, etc. Ironing out the necessary technical stuff.

When I have my eye on something, it's generally all I can think of. I become obsessed, and I want to move at the speed of light. I learn patience, little by little.

This weekend, my oldest son graduates from high school. My first baby is going to pass into adulthood. He'll be 18 this month. Where in the world does time go? I'd speed up time for my class, but I'd slow it way down for the summer I am to have with my boys. Especially the oldest, who will most likely be joining the armed forces in the fall. I am a protector, and sending him somewhere that I can not protect him is difficult for me.

Anyway... watch for new stuff coming soon from me.

Tuesday, June 1, 2010


I had a very busy long weekend. I finalized my online class and have been testing out a couple of different sites to host it on. It will basically be an artist empowerment course, helping you deal with fear, roadblocks, etc. So you can have all the tools you need to forge onward despite people and circumstances around you! I was hoping to begin in the middle of June, but I want to make sure to iron all the bugs out prior, so I will keep you posted on that! My class will be 6 weeks long and the only thing you'll need is a journal. Any journal, to write down your ideas, answer questions, work through things, etc.

I've kept my photography going, hanging my work in local places... but it really isn't my focus these days. I haven't sold a photo in forever, and the photography market on etsy is pretty saturated. I also have the issue with trying to sell locally that everyone has photos of the same stuff. The waterfalls, the same beaches, etc. That fact reminds me of my dream to be a travel photographer.

I hope to have a book out in the next year or so... perhaps I can do my travel photography while on my book tour :-). I have dreams. I have plans. And I have goals.

What would you like to share today?

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